What Would Jane Austen Do?

Note: It took me ALL DAMN DAY to code this poll, so you people had better get to voting. What books should we read this summer? Vote for five. When You Are Engulfed in Flames The Writing Class, by Jincy Willett I Capture the Castle, by Dodie Smith Heyday: A Novel, by Kurt Andersen How Perfect Is That?, by Sarah Bird The Memoirs of a Beautiful Boy, by Robert Leleux What It Is, by Lynda Barry Animal, Vegetable, Miracle: A Year of Food Life, by Barbara Kingsolver Shining City: A Novel, by Seth Greenfield Voting is closed now. Thank you for participating! pollcode.com free polls

How I wish you were around today!

from xkcd (click to enlarge) (THOUSANDS of bonus points if you can identify that song for me.)

It was the best day EVER on Deadspin today. Editor Will Leitch is leaving after tomorrow (he'll be a contributing editor at New York magazine). Today his friends and enemies alike roasted him all afternoon. Tomorrow will probably be even better. Call in sick, crack open a bottle, and join in the fun.

courtesy of Mr. George Carlin. "There are 400,000 words in the English language," Carlin mused. "And there are seven of them that you can't say on television. What a ratio that is. 399,993 to seven. They must really be bad. You know the seven don't you? Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker, and tits. Those are the heavy seven. Those are the ones that will infect your soul, curve your spine and keep the country from winning the war. I can dig why some of those words got on the list, like cocksucker and motherfucker . Those are heavyweight words. There's a lot going on there, man. Besides the literal translation and the emotional feeling. They're just busy words. There's a lot of syllables to contend with. And those K's. Those are aggressive sounds, they jump out at you. Forget those seven, they're out. But, there are some two-way words. You can prick your finger -- but you can't finger your prick."

Hollister Hovey Hovey Vintage

Okay, you whiny little slackers -- FIVE books. We'll vote later on this week.

Who wants to have a Summer Book Club? (Mom? Anybody?) I thought we could try to read one book a week through the end of the summer. Below are some of my suggestions; leave yours in the comments. There are a few simple rules, though: 1) NO DEAD BABIES Okay, that’s all I can think of, though I reserve the right to promulgate additional rules on the spot as necessary. As soon as we get at least ten nominees, I'll put up a poll so we can vote on the books. I figure we have nine weeks left until Labor Day. My list: When You Are Engulfed in Flames The Writing Class I Capture the Castle (because of Lynne ) Heyday: A Novel

for Papi.

oooh -- Island Splash flavor It's Mid-Summer's Eve ... hope you're having a good one.

Guest Post by Papi Chulo So Mamacita has left town with the kiddos and headed for the great outdoors (well, apparently there is a golf resort of some sort involved, but it still counts as a campout because there are trees, lakes, and Coleman stoves involved). She asked, as she headed out the door, if I would mind putting up a quick ‘guest’ post for her gentle readers to tide them over until her return ( or until she finds an unsecured wireless network.) “Sure”, I said, “I could post up something about the Pandora ”… Her eyes rolled …” or maybe play through Oregon Trail using my real life friends names inserted and post everyone’s fates?” She shook her head. “Maybe the inherent evils of Sarbanes Oxley ?” I offered. “Sure” she finally conceded “but at least make it humorous, make a list of wacky fantasy stuff you could do while your wife and children are away, like hiring a hooker…” “Hiring hookers isn’t something people fantasize about, I think its something they settle for” I retorted.

Remember when SGM had her brilliant suggestion of showing up to a party with a tray of Jell-O shots? That SGM is one crafty little woman. I decided to take her advice for the big party last weekend, when I stumbled on the greatest invention of the 21st century. Twist'n Shot Jello Shot Cups The genius of these little numbers is the plastic insert that scrapes the sides of the cup and pops out to deliver the jiggly, alcoholic goodness right into your mouth. Inspired by their website, I even got all gourmet with the shots. These were all pretty good: [Each recipe makes 10-12 shots and needs to be refrigerated for at least four hours.] Chocolate-Covered Cherry 1 c boiling water 1 three-ounce box Cherry Jell-O 1/3 c chocolate liqueur 1/3 c vanilla vodka 1/3 c cold water 10-12 maraschino cherries Place a maraschino cherry in the bottom of each cup. Dissolve Jell-O in boiling water, then add liquors and water. Pour mixture into cups, chill and serve. Blueberry-Malibu 1 c boiling

Dude, MASH is online ! You know, Mansion/Apartment/Shack/House -- the girls' game from elementary school. That black Camaro is gonna be MINE! Thanks, Jo Photo from Internet Auto Guide

From Mir , one of the G orgeous L adies O f the W eb, comes news of a deal at Amazon : Buy $25 worth of beauty products from a single Amazon seller and get $20 back (or a free six-month subscription to Us Weekly ). [Also, if you spend $50 at Sephora's Amazon shop you get free shipping. What? I'm just trying to save you some MONEY here.] My list of Things To Try has a bunch of drugstore stuff on it right now, but I can usually be inspired to spend $25 at Sephora. Some ideas: Benefit Cosmetics Eye Bright , $18 Carmindy swears by this stuff. I haven't tried it yet. Sephora Brand Metallic Sequin Clutch , $9 Aren't these cute? The description doesn't give the dimensions, though. Sephora Piiink So Belle Multi-Use Make Up Palette , $20 Looks like a good teenager gift. Sephora Girls Wallet Size Palette , $10 This would be Becca's favorite birthday present.